Forever My Angel
by samashhh
Summary: “A muggle disease? What does that mean?” He swallowed hard, afraid of the answer. “I’m dying Draco, I have a month or so left to live.”


**Guardian Angel**

**Plot: **'How far will you go save the ones you love?' _'Anything,_' It's a story about sacrifice, love and trust.** (HGDM)**

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything but the plot.

**When I see your smile  
Tears run down my face I can't replace  
**

Her body laid still, blood still pouring; her skin pale and cold. There was no pulse, no heart beating. Know one wanted to come to terms with this tragedy, this realization of the truth. That she was dead.

There was no movement on the monitor, a straight line. She was gone, lost to everyone. A man sat nearby, holding her hand, tears pouring down his face. It was the first time he had ever cried, and he didn't know what to do.

"What did I ever do to deserve this?" He whispered.

There was no answer; no one else was in the room. The healer had only told them ten minutes ago of the news. No one wanted to accept it, why should they?

The man had no idea how long he'd been sitting in the room, until he felt a hand on his shoulder. "Draco?"

The man stiffened, his eyes blurred with tears, covered his face to hide the red blotches on his face. "It's okay to cry you know."

"I know Harry, I-I just don't know what I'm going to do. Her- she…was, she is apart of my life. We made a vow to each other, and she broke it, she left me."

"You know this is not her fault, nor is it yours. It was unfortunate, and we'll miss her. She was like a sister to Ron and I and we'll never forget her. But just because she's gone, doesn't mean you can't live."

**And now that I'm stronger I've figured out  
How this world turns cold and breaks through my soul  
**

"What if I can't, what if I can't live without her? What am I going to do Harry?" The man looked away and stared ahead at the figure on the hospital bed.

There was movement, and the healer entered the room. Unplugging all the wires, cords. The figure still lay in the bed, unnoticed, and it was suddenly dark.

"_Hermione, are you alright?"_

"_I'm fine Harry, really. I just didn't get enough sleep last night, that's all."_

"_Hermione, something's wrong, I can tell when you lie. What's going on?"_

_The woman sighed, tears forming in her eyes. "I have leukemia, Harry."_

"She didn't deserve this, I hate this, and I hate what happened to her. There's nothing I can do about it. I feel like I've betrayed her somehow, like I didn't do all I could."

"You saved her Malfoy."

"But what good did it do? She's gone now, and it's because of me."

**And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one.  
**

"You've got to stop blaming yourself; no one could have stopped this."

"I think I need to be alone right now, if you don't mind."

"Take all the time you need. I'll be there if you want to talk."

"Thanks Harry."

"No problem."

The healer returned, asking him kindly to leave the room, but he wouldn't budge, wouldn't leave her. He couldn't, not now. He screamed, yelled out her name, but there was no answer. When the healer had to sedate him because he wouldn't leave her, things had gotten ugly.

He returned to their home, one they've lived in for two years; their empty home. Every room he walked through reminded him of her. She never said goodbye. He didn't want to sleep, didn't want to live anymore.

**I will never let you fall  
I'll stand up with you forever **

What was he supposed to do now that she was gone? He wouldn't move on. She was the love of his life, or was. She had never told him, she had a month left or so. She had broken down.

_She paced the room, afraid. He would be home soon, he said he'd come home early so they could talk. She had something very important to tell him and that the truth couldn't wait anymore. She heard a noise from the fireplace as her husband flooed and was now home. _

"_Draco."_

"_Hello dear." He kissed her lightly on the forehead before sitting down on the couch. She paced the floor again, while her husband told her that whatever she had to tell him, he could handle it. _

_Only she knew he wouldn't, not ever. Nothing would ever be the same again. _

"_I don't know how to tell you this..."_

"_You can tell me anything. I won't get mad."_

"_It's not you getting mad that I'm worried about."_

"_What is it?"_

_She took a deep breath. She didn't want to tell him but she had dreaded this moment and had avoided this conversation as much as possible. "I'm sick Draco."_

"_Sick?" He had a puzzled look upon his face. "I don't understand do you need to go to St. Mungo's?"_

"_No, that's not what I mean. I've been to the hospital and there's nothing they can do. I have leukemia, a muggle disease Draco." Tears were falling but she kept her gaze towards her husband, she wanted to see his reaction. _

"_A muggle disease? What does that mean?" He swallowed hard, afraid of the answer._

"_I'm dying Draco, I have a month or so left."_

_His voice was caught in his throat; he didn't want to hear those words. He had a beautiful wife, a wonderful home and an exceptional job. This could not be happening. "Don't say that, you do not have a month left, you have years."_

"_No Draco. I don't. You don't understand there's no cure, no potion or antidote for this kind of thing. I'm dying Draco and there's nothing either of us can do. You just have to accept it."_

_He shook his head furiously. "No, I won't accept it; I don't want to hear that my wife of two years is dying after everything we've been through."_

"_We can't hide this Draco, the press, everyone will find out. I wanted to tell you before it were too late. You know I love you right?"_

"_Of course, but you're not dying. You can't."_

**I'll be there for you through it all  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven **

"_Draco, please."__She was desperate; she wanted her husband to be able to understand her situation. As much of a bad situation it was, they would get through it, together._

_Draco rubbed his face, getting rid of the unshed tears that wouldn't fall. He couldn't believe this, didn't want to. His wife was dying and nothing he did or could do would stop this disease from spreading. He only had a month with her, if only he had eternity._

"_I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I don't know- I love you Hermione, and I-"He stuttered through his words, unsure of what to say. _

_She wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him closely. "Love me Draco, that's all I ask of you."_

He remembered after he heard the news, he didn't want to let his wife go. He spent almost every minute with her, up until that day; the last day. They were having dinner together and she had gotten up to go and get the salt from the kitchen counter. She felt her head and suddenly she was falling. He had caught her in midair, asking her what was wrong. He knew the time had come.

He had rushed her to the hospital where they put his wife in extensive care. She was there for four days until she couldn't live anymore. It was so sudden; he hadn't even been there when it happened. Potter had told him to go home and rest for a couple of hours before resuming to tend to his wife. He hadn't wanted to leave her, if he hadn't left-.

It was a shock to everyone. Not everyone knew of her situation but when the news was told, they couldn't help but let the tears fall. She had accomplished so much in so little time. They would miss her a great deal. No one could replace her.

**It's ok. It's ok. It's ok.**

He paced his empty bedroom, her stuff surrounding him, suffocating him. He couldn't live like this; she was everywhere, taunting him, blaming him for her illness. The guilt he held inside was starting to pour. He wanted to scream, throw something at the wall; he didn't want to feel this agony, this pain.

It had been days, weeks and he still wasn't getting better, how could he? His wife, the love of his life was dead and there was nothing he could do about it. He tried to imagine life before he met Hermione, the real Hermione. Not Granger, he'd hated throughout his school years.

He remembered the first time he saw her after the war.

_She was walking hand and hand with Weasley, laughing. She looked different, alive. He remembered the war and what it had done to his family. He was surprised when he hadn't been sent to Azkaban, like he'd thought. Miraculously Potter had saved him and his entire family of prison for the sole purpose that Potter knew they weren't the cruelest people in the Wizarding world._

_He looked at her, as if seeing her for the time. No longer was her hair bushy, but it shone in the sunlight in curly waves, her eyes vibrant with happiness. He knew then that he wanted that, to be happy. _

_He noticed Weasley giving him curious glances, but he decided to ignore him. He knew he and Granger were together ever since the war, but he couldn't help but feel in the pit of his heart an emotion he'd never thought he had; jealousy. He wanted what Weasley had, affection, love. He was jealous of what Weasley had a relationship with someone he cared about. _

_He'd been a bitter man, never to trust anyone with his feelings. He been brought up to hate love, love was a sign of weakness. Draco knew that even though his father had told him of this, he still loved his wife. Lucius was never one to admit anything as kind and loving. His relationship with Pansy, if one could call it that, had been nothing but physical, he never felt anything for her and he knew Pansy had felt the same about him. The only reason he'd held on to her for so long was so that he felt the need to have someone, even if he hadn't care for her. _

_Though now, looking back throughout his years, he realized he'd been a horrible person; taunting everyone who didn't deserve it. He wanted to apologize and that surprised him the most, he was actually sorry for what he'd done._  
**  
Seasons are changing  
And waves are crashing **

_Another year had gone by since then, that day he saw Granger and Weasley paroling the streets. He was in a store library, surprising of all things. He had nothing better to do and he hated staying cooped up in the manor. He needed some new books, he'd decided long ago to become involved with Potions since he'd done exceptionally well in his grades on that particular class. Though it did some help that Snape had favored him. He'd been searching for a new potions book when he heard the jingle of the bell, which told him someone had walked in the store. _

_He tried not to look over for he was engrossed in finding that particular book. Though the curly brown hair caught his eye and he turned, surprised to see her there. She noticed him at first but avoided eye contact, wondering if he would make a remark. When he didn't, she approached him. _

"_Malfoy, it's been quite a while since I've seen you."_

_He took a moment to look her over, she didn't look too different from the last time he'd seen her. "Likewise Granger. Still with Weasley I presume?" He asked, not sure as to why, curiosity maybe?_

"_Actually no, I broke up with him five months ago. Why the sudden interest Malfoy?"_

"_I'm surprised; everyone thought you'd be together forever."_

"_Well things just didn't work out. We were too different. We argued too much for us to have an actual relationship."_

"_I see."_

"_What about you and Parkinson?" She'd asked him._

_He laughed, Parkinson? There was nothing to tell. "We never dated, and I surely hope we never do."_

_She looked surprised by his comment; she was trying to figure out the logic behind his words. "So, what brings you here?"_

"_Reading; as much of a know-it-all you are, you're not the only one who enjoys reading. I just never flaunted about the fact that I like to read."_

"_I figured as much Malfoy; you were after all second highest to me in grades. I didn't think you just passed without actually studying like some people I know." They both laughed at that, caught up in the moment._

"_Say Granger, how would you like to go for some coffee, we can sit down and catch up, what do you say?" He'd asked her. He knew he was out of character, acting differently then when he was back in school. He couldn't always be the arrogant prick he'd been in school. People did have to grow up eventually._

"_You're asking me out for coffee? You sure you're feeling alright Malfoy? I suppose I could though, you're lucky I have nothing planned." She smiled at him then, a smile he never thought would be directed at him. He gave her a slight grin; it'd been a long time since the last time he'd smiled. "Shall we?" Offering his arm, and they took off towards the coffee shop down the street._

_He never would have imagined himself having coffee with her, talking about anything and everything that had gone on with their lives. He never would have imagined enjoying her company. She wasn't just a know-it-all anymore, and he didn't believe in those prejudiced lies of blood status anymore. He never would have imagined that after two months of talking with her, he'd fallen for her._

He wondered if he hadn't been in that bookstore long ago, would his life turned out differently? He never would have been happy, he was sure. She had taught him so much, all those things he thought when he was younger, vanished. She taught him how to live and he had never been happier, until now.  
**  
And stars are falling all for us  
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter **

He remembered the first time he'd asked her out on a date, their first kiss, he'd never had felt that way before, love in a sense. He'd never believed in love. He remembered the first time she'd told her friends that they were a couple and how he'd nearly been killed. Potter and Weasley hadn't taken the news quite well which of course had been expected. They were Hermione's best friends and he had learned to respect them in a friendly manner. Not saying he'd always gotten along with them but he'd made the effort for her, which she had always appreciated. He remembered the first time he told her he loved her; they'd been dating nearly a year. It had been a surprise to both of them. She hadn't expected it, Draco had been nervous enough finally bringing the courage to tell her when he blurted it out. She been shocked, but happy all the same. She had told him she'd loved him too, bringing their relationship to the next level. She'd given him her virginity that night, though Draco knew that Weasley had never gone that far with her. Although Draco wasn't a virgin, he treated her as though it was the first time. In some ways it had been, he hadn't been drunk; they'd taken the time to get used to each other, each caress, and each and every piece of skin that touched. He took it slow, and she had thanked him all the more for it.

_He was pacing again, the bulge in his pocket. He knew she'd be home soon. He took notice of the room, making sure everything was perfect. He didn't want to screw this up. He was a nervous wreck and just the thought of her rejecting him was enough to blow his ego but break his heart. He heard her as she flooed in. He noticed her appearance, beautiful as always._

"_Draco, what's all this?"_

_There in the middle of the room, was a dinner set for two in their flat, candles lit and the lights dimmed low. "What, I'm not allowed to surprise my girlfriend with dinner, or is that so much to ask for?"_

"_No of course not, I'm just surprised. I didn't expect it."_

"_Of course you didn't Hermione, hence the surprise." He smiled cheekily, guiding her towards her seat when he pulled it out for her as a true gentleman would. _

_The talked throughout dinner, how she was doing at work, what he'd done that day, etc. They both had hectic jobs but always made the time to spend together. Once they finished dinner, Draco put all the plates in the dishwasher they'd purchased, still getting used to all those muggle contraptions. He felt for the bulge in his pocket making sure he hadn't lost it. He opened the fridge and took out the dessert he purchased, since after trying several times, he failed to cook anything decent. He set it in between them and they ate silently. He was known for what was coming next, and he wasn't sure he could go through with this. He was Draco Malfoy, he didn't get nervous, yet the goose bumps and the thought that she'd say no was pounding in his heart. Once they finished their dessert, he set it aside he watched her features carefully not able to understand how lucky he'd been; Lucky to have met such a wonderful person._  
**  
I can show you I'll be the one **

_She was about to leave the table, but before she could leave, he held her hand, pleading silently that he was yet finished. "What's wrong Draco?"_

"_Nothing, everything is absolutely perfect."_

"_Alright, I'm just going to go and change."_

"_No, wait."_

"_What is it?"_

_He got up out of his chair. He really was going to do this; there was no going back now. He got down on one knee, looking into her eyes. "Hermione, I've known you since we were eleven years old and to say that we've come this far to be together, I've never been happier. You're my life, and I don't know what I'd do if I hadn't met you. What I'm, trying to say, really. Is a, Hermione I love you and nothing will change my feelings for you and I was wondering if you'd do the honor of becoming my wife?"_

_He looked into her eyes, seeing the tears pouring down her face, afraid that this meant she didn't want to marry him. He was about to get up when she wrapped her arms around his neck. "Yes, I'll marry you." Her tears mixed into his shirt, but he could care less for this was one of the most joyous days of his life. He kissed her then, afraid of letting her go, she'd disappear. She was his fiancée now. He pulled out the bulge in his pocket and opened the box, a beautiful sapphire ring stood out in its glory. He knew that Hermione didn't like fancy jewelry and that she would hate him for buying her expensive jewelry she wouldn't wear. He placed the ring on his fiancé's finger as she gasped. "It's beautiful Draco."_

_It was cheesy for him to say it but he couldn't help it. "Not as beautiful as you."_

**I will never let you fall  
I'll stand up with you forever**

He remembered his wedding, as disastrous as it was, the cake ruined, Hermione's dress being ripped, rain washing all the guests in cold water. He had never felt happier, soaked to the bone, but happy none the less. Holding his wife, dancing, telling her he'd love her till he died. The memories would always be there and he didn't want to forget them. He would have to move on, as much as it pained him. His friends were going to be there and as much as he wanted to be alone, they would feel this pain too. They were her best friends, they'd known her far longer than he ever did, and for that he was thankful that she'd had a good life. He would miss her, he would hide his emotions from everyone only they would know and as much as he hated showing weakness, he was weak.

He didn't like to cry, he didn't like to take his anger out on anyone, and he kept to himself. If he had a problem, there had only been one person he could confide in. But now, there was no one.

He sat in their flat, looking around. The pictures that hung up on the wall, full of laughter and smiles, would he ever be able to have that again? He wished he had saved her, saved her from this terrible fate that had cost her life. He remembered her last words to him.

"_Draco?" Weak from all the medicine, lying in the hospital; she'd been there for two days since her fall._

"_Hmm?" holding her close. _

"_Promise me something?"_

_He looked at her then, brushing her hair out of face. "What is it, darling?"_

"_Promise me when I'm gone that you won't cry for me, you won't mourn for me."_

_Words caught in his throat, "Hermione, you know I can't promise you that. I love you."_

"_I love you too, just please promise me. Nothing you do will be able to bring me back once I'm gone, and I've accepted this fate long ago. I'm scared Draco, really I am. I'm scared I'll never see you again, I'm scared I'll never see my friends and family ever again. I'm scared of not being with you. Everything happens for a reasons and not everybody gets to have a happily ever after."_

"_Shh, don't say that. You did get your happily ever after. I'm scared too; I don't know what I'm going to do without you."_

"_You're going to live Draco. I don't want you to think about all the regrets, the mistakes you made. You did nothing but love me and that's all I could possibly ask for. I know it'll be difficult, but I know you can do it, I have faith in you."_

"_I wish I had as much confidence as you do, I fear I won't be okay, I fear I won't be able to live without you."_

"_You will Draco, you're stronger than that. Just know that I never stopped loving you, and I'll always be there for you."_

"_How will you be there for me when you're dead?" He hadn't meant to shout it, he was aggravated, the doctors weren't telling him anything, and his wife was dying. He was on a verge of tears and he feared that if he didn't leave the room soon, he would break down. He hated crying and he rarely ever did. _

_She placed her once warm hand, now gone slightly paler and cold and placed in on his chest. "I'll always be there for you because I'll always be in your heart. Draco, as long as you love me, I'll always be there."_  
**  
I'll be there for you through it all  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven **

What was he supposed to do now? Live his life like he'd hadn't just lost the love of his life. He hardly thought that it was that simple. He didn't have anything to look forward too; he wasn't able to celebrate those yearly anniversaries, Valentine's Day, birthdays. He felt hopeless. He didn't emerge from their flat for weeks, too depressed, afraid to sleep, to dream. His first instinct was too drink his problems away but he knew he knew at the end of the day that it wouldn't solve anything. He'd wake up with a headache, hung over and in pain all over. The pain would never leave him, but he would heal in time. He would try.

Harry came by the next day, knocking on his door, though he didn't want to answer it, he did anyways. "You look like shit," Those were the first words Potter spoke to him; he gave him a dull look and responded. "I feel like shit, Potter, but thank you for noticing," He said dryly.

"At least you haven't lost your sense of humor then."

"Listen, if you've come to have a whole heart chat about our feelings, I'd like to sit it out if you don't mind. I'm not exactly in the best mood."

"I know that, I'm just tired of you sitting there walloping in self pity, you're carrying this huge pit of guilt with you, you can't blame yourself for her death, and nothing you or I could have prevented it."

"Don't you think I fucking know that? Do you not realize I've tried a thousand times, I can't forget her but I can't mourn for her, than what I am supposed to fucking do?"

"What you can do is get off your lazy arse and start taking care of _your_ child."

Draco swallowed, through his wife's illness their child, at seven months old was quite the trouble to care for. He remembered when his wife first told him that she was pregnant, he probably would have jumped for joy but that would have been out of the question, he still had some dignity and pride left within him. His daughter, only a year old now, Draco could hardly look at her now. She looks so much like her mother, it pained him; her curly hair, her eyes, her cute button nose. During their last days as husband and wife, he'd sent his daughter to stay with his mother. It had been two weeks since then, he was afraid. He was a single widowed father coping with a one year old daughter. He couldn't handle it, he was proud to be a father, he was just scared, scared of what would happen now. The future, he didn't even know what to tell his daughter when she was old enough when the questions would come of why she didn't have a mother.  
**  
Cause you're my, you're my, my true love,**

"I know Potter, thank you for reminding me." He gritted his teeth. It was bad enough he had Potter to annoy him to no end and reminding him he'd forgotten his daughter. He hadn't forgotten his daughter was the second most precious thing in his life.

"We're worried about you Malfoy; you've barely talked to anyone within the last weeks. You're _NOT_ the only one grieving here."

Draco knew this was true, but it was just too hard to except. He lost his wife but they had lost their best friend, their sister, their family. He knew he was selfish, his grief was reflecting everybody else.

"I know I'm not the only one grieving, I get it. How exactly do you expect me to keeping living like this? I can't pretend I didn't loose her, I can't pretend, I won't. This is going to take time, the shock to where off. I won't ever have a normal life, no one has. The only thing closest to me right now, the closest thing to _her_, is my daughter. I love her and I would never let anything happen to her."

"No one is expecting you to live a normal life, hell if anyone has had close to a normal life I'd want to switch places with them. All I'm saying is that you need to start leading your life. She may be gone, but your daughter needs you." Harry said.

Draco saw the truth in his eyes, he was tired, and they all were. Harry was right, and hated it when he was. "I know she does, I just don't think I can handle it, I don't want to turn out to be the father mine was. I'm about to raise this child on my own, Potter. Do you not understand that?"

"It's a good thing you aren't alone then Malfoy, you're an idiot if you didn't think we weren't going to help you. I'm Eve's Godfather, remember?"

"Yes I know Potter, wasn't my choice of course. Nevertheless, you can't always be there for her, she's always going to wonder who her mother is, why she wasn't there while she was growing up. I'm fucking afraid that I won't be able to tell her the truth."

"Then we'll help you Malfoy, you're not alone in this. Your mother, her grandmother is there, I'm here, so is Ginny, Ron, and Luna. We're there to help you. As much as we hated you in the past, we can admit we've had our differences but I think you and I both know we've gotten past it. Do you not trust me?"

"Yes, I trust you."

"Then trust me to help you. We all were apart of Her-"

"Don't." Draco said sternly, he avoided saying her name for a week, her name no longer able to talk about.

"You can't avoid saying her name; she was your wife for god sake's."

"I don't want to talk about her in past tense, I don't want to relish the fact that she's gone and she's never coming back."

"Hate to break it you, but it's the truth. She isn't coming back. We all loved her, she was apart of our family, and _you_ are apart of that whether you like it or not. I know it's going to take awhile and that you need your space but you need to trust us enough to help you whenever you need it. You don't need to become a stranger just because Hermione's dead."

**My whole heart  
**

Draco sighed; he knew he shouldn't put the blame on himself, the guilt, the pain. He had to take orders within his own hands. He was an adult. He never had dealt with a loved one before whom he'd lost in the family. He'd never grieved. He hated it now though; it felt like a thousand knives going through his heart a thousand times. Love was such a powerful word.

"Fine,"

"I know you don't want to talk about this but what are your plans for a funeral?" Harry asked lightly.

"A funeral? I don't know Potter. It's too soon right now, maybe in a month or so."

"That's fine." Harry got up, ready to leave, he looked at his friend sullen, tired, grief written all over his face. He knew it would take time, hell he was still grieving for all those people he lost so many years ago. Hermione was his best friend, had been since he was 11. He knew Ron was doing no better, Hermione had been his best friend too, his first love, girlfriend, his sister. "I shall see you around Malfoy."

Draco didn't answer, but he knew that when he looked up, Potter was gone and he was alone again. He knew he had a lot to deal with, his daughter was first priority, and he was intent on getting her that day.

Grabbing a coat, chilly as it was, he Apparated to his Mother's home. He heard crying in the nursery and knew where to find his daughter. His mother was sitting in a rocking chair holding his daughter, rocking her, trying to calm her.

"Mother," He stated, making it known that he was there.

Narcissa was surprised to see her son there, she knew he was having a hard time and thought she wouldn't see him for at least a couple more days. "Draco, what are you doing here?"

"I had a few words with Potter and I suddenly realize where I need to be right now." Draco held out his arms, so he could take his daughter. He held her gently, supporting her. She was walking now, which was quite an achievement considering what had been going on within the past months. He'd been distracted, trying to take care of his wife and daughter at the same time. It was hard to imagine his daughter growing up without him knowing.

**Please don't throw that away **

"She missed her father," Narcissa pointed out. "And it seems you must have the magic touch, she just wouldn't go to sleep before and now she's calmly sleeping."

Draco looked down at his daughter in his arms and saw the little girl sleeping peacefully. He only wished he could do the same. "I should go home."

"Draco, really stay awhile. You hardly spend any time with your mother as it is."

"Fine, I'll stay for dinner but then I'm going home."

"Good, I know right now isn't the best time but how are you feeling, Draco you've been cooped up in your flat for the weeks."

"What? You're keeping tabs on me now?"

"No, but I was informed that my only son was refusing to see people and trying to shut everyone out of his life. Draco that is not like you and you know it."

"Mother, people do change. How is it my fault that I don't want to see anyone after I just lost my wife? Why can't people understand that I just want to be left alone?"

"People do understand, dear. Everyone grieves differently; I certainly didn't grieve for your father."

"That was because you hated him. There's a difference." Draco stated.

"None the less, I want to see you and my granddaughter more often and I'm not giving you an option."

"Yes Mother,"**  
**

**Cause I'm here for you  
Please don't walk away, **

_Three years_, it's been. On this daily ritual, walking through the park, his daughter will swing on the swing, doll in hand. She'll laugh and play and Draco tries to imagine that this was the life he still would have had, had his wife still been alive. He sits on the park bench, watching his daughter. Observing the other families with their children, the mother and father's spending time with their child taking time out of their busy schedules.

"Daddy, come play with me." He reluctantly refuses, saying he's too old. His daughter laughs, "No silly, no one's too old to play on the swing." She grabs his hand forcing him to get up off the bench and over to the swing. He never could say no to his daughter. Her brown youthful eyes mixed with her blond curly hair. She was a beautiful child.

He didn't think he was completely healed, there were some days when he was happy, smiling, laughing, hanging out with his friends and family. There were other days when he couldn't do anything, staying in bed, wanting to drown. He was alone and yet he wasn't. He didn't cry, sometimes it was hard to believe that he felt anything. His daughter was the only that kept him alive. She was so full of life and he cherished every moment spent with her. He didn't want to lose her like he lost his wife; he refused to let anything happen to her. He knew that at times, he could be the overprotected father but he knew it was only because he wanted her safe.

His daughter had no idea of the world out of the muggle world, and he wished she wouldn't find out. The Wizarding world was full of death, despair and pain, Voldemort, death eaters, magic. It was hard to believe that so long ago he thought muggles should be ridden of the world. Wasn't too long that he found out they were useful, full of technology, electricity. It was surprising how they were able to get around without having to use a wand and saying a spell.

"Come Eve, it's almost dinner time, it's getting late."

"But Daddy, one more swing, please?" He couldn't say no, he nodded and let his daughter push up on the swing and let her feet fly in the air a couple of times before she came off the swing. Her shoes full of sand, mud on her face. She was smiling though, and he wondered how she could be so happy and disgustingly dirty at the same time and simply not have a care in world.

He pulled her along, on their small walk back to their flat they shared. He still lived in the same place, he didn't want his memories to disappear, the pictures, and they were all he had of her. He made them dinner once inside and gave her a bath. She would be starting school next year, and it was quite scary to see his little girl growing up, and one day she'd leave him and he'd be alone again. He wanted her happy, carefree; he didn't want her to be afraid. He didn't want to lose her. Every night, after dinner she asked him to tell her a bed time story. It was always the same story. It was always about her mother, the love of his life and how he would never forget her.

"Tell me again Daddy, please."

"You've heard this story a million times Eve."

"Please Daddy,"

"Fine," He sat down on his daughter's bed, fluffing her pillows and tucking her in. "Once upon a time…"  
**  
Please tell me you'll stay, stay**

Every month, either with his daughter or without her, he would visit _her._ He had moved on in a sense, he lived on. His daughter was the only one holding him back from ending his own life. He wouldn't give up, his daughter meant too much to him. He stared back at the plaque, so simple and yet beautiful. He laid the lilacs by her grave; her favorite flower.

"I miss you so much." He whispered. He felt the wind pick up. He knew she was watching over him.

"I love you Mommy," His daughter said, as she place her own flower on her mother's grave.

**…**

"Daddy, hurry up, we don't want to be late."

"Eve, we're not going to be late."

"Yes we are! The train leaves in 20 minutes."

"Do you have everything packed?"

"Of course, I packed it last night, twice!"

"Let's go then,"

It was his daughter's first year going to Hogwarts, to say the least of his worries. His daughter wasn't in the least bit nervous but quite excited to be joining all the young witches and wizards attending their first year. They arrived at King's Cross station ten minutes before the Hogwarts Express was to leave. Eve had said her goodbye's to her uncles, aunts and cousins. Last but not least was her father, the man who had raised her on his own. They had never been apart before this; Eve could feel the tears starting to fall as she hugged her father tightly. "Bye Daddy, I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too."

Within the last few moments, Eve kissed her father on the cheek before boarding the Hogwarts Express, waving happily to everyone. When the train finally left the station, Draco stood there; watching, not really noticing the people leave, or walk by.

"You've raised her well; I know she's going to do great." Ginny Potter said to him. He knew she was right; his daughter was too bright for her own good. "Hermione would be proud." He nodded his head; Hermione if she were here, would have been in tears crying over how her baby was finally growing up. "Well I suspect James will be just like his father next year then?" Draco asked his smirk in place.

"Oh don't start that, let's just hope that they won't get into too much trouble next year."

"Well knowing both James and Eve, you can expect great things from them." Ginny laughed.

**Use me as you will  
Pull my strings just for a thrill **

"Care to come back to our place for a drink Draco?" Ginny asked.

"And have to spend my time with filth like you, I don't think so." He smiled, jokingly. They had been friends for too long.

"Owl me and let me know what house Eve gets into." She smiled and Apparated back to her home.

He was alone then, his daughter off and on her way to Hogwarts, a place he had called home once upon a time for seven years. He Apparated back to the home he shared with his daughter, walking into the empty flat. He appeared in his daughter's room, she'd grown up, how had the years gone by so quickly? He remembered only holding her in his arms for the first time after his wife had given birth. She was beautiful. The blonde wispy hair, the blue eyes at first glance but soon turned to a beautiful brown eye color like her mother's. He always wondered what he did to have such a wonderful life, a wonderful family.

Now, he was alone. The bitterness, the cold heart he had now. His wife and daughter both gone. Sure he still had his mother and his friends, but it was never going to be enough. He knew the saying, 'It's best to have loved than to have never loved at all.' But then again, he had never really known what love was until he met Hermione. His father, a cruel lying cheating bastard had told lies of purity, and how power was all a Malfoy would ever need. Draco knew though, power and money was nothing, it had never meant anything to him.

His heart would always be with Hermione, without her he probably wouldn't have survived. She gave up her life for him. She could have been happily blissfully married to Weasley for all he knew and she gave it all up for someone like him who had treated her horribly for seven years. He never understood how she was able to see past his faults and mistakes that he had made in the past. He always felt guilty for everything he had done, the regret for not doing the right thing when the time came. He was never a good person and yet she had loved him.

It's been 10 year since her death, and he was still trying. He knew that he'd broken his promise by mourning for her and if she were there, she would have scolded him for it. She was a stubborn witch half the time, but he would have never had her any other way.

He settled for a good book until it reached 8 in the evening where he set to make himself something to eat. He heard light tapping at the window, and reached forward to take the letter from the owl.

'_Daddy,_

_Hogwarts is everything you describe it would be and more. I can't wait to start classes and meet with all the teachers. We have a new potions teacher, I have a feeling I won't like him very much, but I can't be good at everything, now can I? The headmistress seems really nice; did you know she was the Head of Gryffindor before she became the headmistress of the school? I met a few people on the train, see Dad, I told you I'd be fine. Anyways, the point of this letter was to tell you which house I was sorted into. I hope you're not mad at me but I was sorted in Gryffindor, just like Mum. The sorting hat couldn't decide at first since I have parents from two different houses. Please don't be mad at me, I'll owl you next week, until then._

_Love,_

_Eve.'_

He couldn't be mad at his daughter even if he tried. He was beyond happy that his daughter was sorted into Gryffindor; she was everything like her mother. The only way you would have been able to tell she was a Malfoy was by the white blond hair in which she had inherited from her father.His daughter, was just as stubborn, she loved to read, and was quite the know-it-all. He knew his wife would be proud of their daughter, he knew he was.  
**  
And I know I'll be ok  
Though my skies are turning gray **

Days progressed, he still visited his wife regularly, but he knew that overtime he wouldn't need to go so often. She would always be with him even when he thought that the rain would never stop, the winter so cold that he could catch ammonia. The sky that would shine through the bright sunlight, the darkness that he thought would surround him. Through thick and thin he knew that without her, he would have been nothing. He loved her and he always would.

She was his guardian angel, watching over him and their daughter, smiling all the while.  
**  
I will never let you fall  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven**

**Author's Notes:** Longest One-Shot I've ever written it took quite a long time for me to write this, so hopefully you'll like it!

**Please read & review!**

Ps. Song lyrics - Guardian Angel by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus.

**sammm**


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